Claire McMahon So many happy memories of the Kings with the Gentils!
Reid Wilcox Our wedding day.
Reid Wilcox Bed full of cousins.
I first met Ruffin when he was really little, maybe even still in diapers. I would babysit during the summers when I was home from university, and then more regularly when I came to UVa later. He was always so sweet, though from his side-glances at me I think he always thought I was a little strange :) One of my first memories is telling Ruffin an...
Adonice D'Atre Ruffin was a bright-eyed golden child, athletic from an early age. So many wonderful memories of his impish smile and sweet, kind spirit from cub scouts, soccer, and classroom activities. Greg, Adonice, David, and Carey
I have so many wonderful memories of Ruffin from the afternoons I spent "kid-sitting" him and Alexandra during my four years at UVA (Ruffin was very clear he was not a baby and therefore did not need a babysitter). One of my favorites was sitting with Ruffin at the kitchen table after school, where at the age of 7, he completed his 20 minutes of d...
Melissa Bond Love watching Ruffin and his cousins running around at our family reunion!
Melissa Bond One of my favorite visits with the Kings - strawberry picking and then hot air balloons landed in the backyard that evening.
I just remember you as a little kid. Running around with the other Ivy boys at Sunday school, Olivet. You were the gentle one. You had a navy backpack with your initials on it, I kept asking you how to spell your name, I thought it was a rad name. Always nice to me, always putting a smile on my face. As we grew into elementary schoolers, I thought ...
Caitlin Wills I met Ruffin on his first birthday, and I went on to babysit him and Alexandra for many years. He was such a joyful baby and kid, always sweet and dependable and had such a loving relationship with his sister. Ruffin and Alexandra were a huge part of my life at the time, and I always wanted my kids to have the same close relationship that they had. I went on to have a girl and boy one year apart, and even they think of themselves as "twins!" I have tons of memories from that time, but this one always makes me smile. This was the 2nd Halloween after our wedding when Ruffin was our ring bearer and Alexandra a flower girl. I was pregnant with our first child, and we drove down to Charlottesville to celebrate Halloween on the Lawn. One of our top priorities (after the candy!) was to see the kids dressed up. Ruffin made the perfect little Draco Malfoy with his white blonde hair. Portman had raided my parents' costume supply to come up with the most ridiculous ensemble to make the kids laugh. I love Ruffin's sweet smile in this photo!
Riley King I will be thinking about him always. Love you Ruffin.
Robert King To one of the most genuinely kind people that I have ever had the pleasure of knowing, thank you for the impact that you had on my life and being the perfect older cousin to look up to. Over this past summer you introduced me to UFC and taught me how to score rounds, and turned it into one of my favorite sports to watch! A day won't go by where you're not on my mind, and I promise you that. I love you Ruffin.
Unfortunately I don't have a picture from one of these visits but the best memories I spent with Ruffin and the King family would be on our yearly drive up to Marthas Vineyard from Charlotte which would always mean a stop in Charlottesville. While the parents, Adelaide and Alexandra would catch up, Peter Ruffin and I would go to their basement fo...
Val King Saunders Ruffin, Winnie, Evan, Phoebe, Alexandra. Stopping off at the CVille Kings' was always a highlight on our way to the Outer Banks each summer. Such a sweet time with these kids together.
Ames Morton-Winter Maeve and Alexandra became friends at Village School, and many of them did Cotillion and attended Farmington’s Holly Ball. Maeve was very shy, and she was nervous about the dance. We were hoping some nice boy would ask her to dance right away. It miraculously happened that way, but that is because that nice boy was Ruffin. He asked Maeve to dance several times, the minute the music started, and it has never been forgotten. Chris was chaperoning in the shadows and felt a wave a relief when he saw Ruffin take Maeve to the dance floor. When Maeve got home, she told us about how she was asked to dance and that Ruffin was the first to ask her and that it was great because he was so tall. He was a very sweet, gentle soul. What middle school boy is so kind and thoughtful to ask the shy, quiet, nervous girl to dance? He surely is in the light. Our love to the King family. Sending prayers of strength.
Val King Saunders
Val King Saunders A strategy session at James Madison's Montpelier. Phoebe and Evan were so absorbed in whatever they saw Ruffin and Alexandra doing.
Val King Saunders Crop out the girls and you have a pretty decent iPhone screen saver (Evan is using this on his phone currently). Donuts seem to have been more popular than apples on this summer orchard visit.
Fletcher Hassenfelt ABA 2011
One of the memories that sticks out to me with Ruffin was back when he was in middle school. My family were visiting the Kings in Charlottesville and Ruffin and I decided to spend our time doing what boys that age often do, compete over video games. Ruffin and I played a soccer video game that got ended up being an intense affair. I was a competiti...
My memories with Ruffin, of course, come from my interactions with Sandra. One memory stands out. In early September 2011, I was taking the Amtrak train from Alexandria to Lynchburg. I happen to look across the aisle and see none other than Alexandra King! Fresh off of a CMW summer, we were delighted to see each other. I immediately slipped into th...
The King family first came into my life in the spring of 2012. Despite having lived in the same town our whole lives, it took until Alexandra and I made the decision to attend St. Andrew's School in DE for our paths to finally cross. For Zaz and I, it was friendship at first sight. When she and her family walked into our house for dinner, our simil...
Sandra Conway I loved the Thanksgivings we shared with Ruffin and his family. Here are a few from the years with Cinda and the Bells in Chapel Hill.
Val King Saunders
Val King Saunders Our Spring Break visit to Charlottesville. Ruffin played one-on-one with Evan in the driveway one morning. Ruffin was all cool confidence and a natural athletic star. It is hard to see Evan's expression in this series but he is simply thrilled to have his older-boy-cousin's undivided attention. Ruffin did not just let Evan shoot freely. I remember Ruffin did some blocking, he stole the ball once. He made it a "real" game and gave young Evan a challenge. That sensibility was so clever and meaningful. It made Evan that much more excited about their play. Ruffin represents everything Evan would want to grow into. This was a special moment for the two boys in the family to connect apart from the rest of us. And very fun to watch their dynamic.
Right at the end of his junior year, I always remember Ruffin as the student whose ears would perk up and he would have a total character change when he heard something interesting. I always felt he was a better writer than he ever gave himself credit for but I remember in one of his last posts in the class, he discussed Robert Creeley and the cal...
I only had the pleasure of meeting Ruffin one time - at Davidson College during the McNab Program for children of alumni, going into our senior year of high school. My first impression of Alexandra and Ruffin was that they were so tall, so blonde, and so kind. There was another girl on the program who came to take an interest in Ruffin, and she fol...
A quote from a high school buddy: “I will always remember Ruffin as the legend in math class who slumped so low in his chair that his knees were above his head. He was subtly hilarious, witty, and an overall great dude. We’ll always remember him for the great guy that he was.”
Elizabeth Hagood Most epic re-enactment by offspring and godchildren ever! Re-enactment at A Bar A Ranch, 2016 Original at Davidson, 1980 (ish)
I was lucky enough to meet Ruffin a few times-- when he came to St. Andrew's to visit Alexandra, when I drove through Charlottesville for a walk or a brief visit. But I knew him best through the memories Alexandra shared with me, which usually went along the lines of his sister talking a mile a minute and Ruffin quietly letting her do her thing (ma...
While I spent thousands of hours with his twin, my roommate of 4 years at SAS, my interactions with Ruffin were not as frequent or as sustained as I'd have liked. The first time we spent an extended period of time together was in the winter of 2015, when I spent a few days at the King's house after they changed my life by graciously taking me to ...
I have a memory of Ruffin shooting baskets with my much younger boys in his driveway - so fun and patient. They just thought he was great.
Ruffin and I worked together at Keswick Hall over the summer. I remember the first day I met him, I couldn't get over how genuine he was. Compassionate, dependable, and above all else, he could light up any room with his smile. Ruffin was a couple years older than me, and I looked up to him as a role model. He was someone who I wanted to emulate be...
Reid Wilcox Dinner at Slims on our great family trip to the A Bar A.
In the times that I've spent with Ruffin throughout my life, he had a truly calming presence that felt so easy to be around. When he visited Alexandra at SAS or when I went to the beach with the Kings I wanted to be in his presence, getting the spot next to him at the restaurant or watching a movie with him and his friends after dinner. It was the ...
Natalie Lewis This is a silly video, but I always felt it was very Ruffin. There was just one class section of Honors Euro and we were in it together—I have a lot of memories of Ruffin from that trimester. At this particular moment, I was filming things for a final project, and as you can tell he may have had mixed feelings about playing a part :)
Beth Miller I feel so fortunate to have had the opportunity to get to know many amazing kids during my teaching career. This particular group is very special to me. Four years watching Ruffin grow into a confident, loving young man was such a privilege.
Benjamin Paschina Ruffin’s STAB graduation in June, 2016. Even though I didn’t go to STAB, I remember Ruffin and his friends telling me what their attire would be so I could match them as a practical joke. Ruffin was always a joy to be around - his ability to make others feel comfortable and welcomed was unmatched by anyone I’ve ever met. He will be dearly missed and will always have a place in our hearts.
Brett Bond First full day at the A-A while watching Justin’s horse riding tutorial. A beautiful day with Ruffin and his Dad.
Peter Conway Love this time at the A-Bar-A where we climbed up to the cross. We looked like we were posing for the cover of a Christian rock album.
Fletcher Hassenfelt The Bells and the Kings
From Tina Chapman: Dear King Family, You don't know us, but our daughter , Lizzy, and Ruffin are friends. We just want you all to know that our hearts are broken for you, and you have been, and will continue to be in our thoughts and prayers. We don't pretend to know what you are going through with such a devastating loss, but please know that we ...
Brett Bond Jr. Taking over London one legal drink at a time
Val King Saunders Thanksgiving at Aunt Catherine's. Between dinner and dessert we walked up to the Central Park Reservoir. Fun family time and gorgeous weather that year.
Val King Saunders The CVille and NYC Kings together for Thanksgiving 2017.
Adelaide Conway One of my fondest memories with Ruffin was taking selfies to send to Alexandra when we ran into each other on a night out at UVA. The sweet soul he was, always put up with my snapchats and it was the biggest joy to see him around grounds during my time in college. From the family meals we shared when I wanted to get away from my dorm, to the selfies we took at fraternity parties, I will be forever grateful to have been a Wahoo with this wonderful cousin of mine. Ruffin, you will be so missed but I know you (and Cinda) are shining your light and sending a "circle of blessings' to the whole family.
Lucinda Bond Every time I drove up to F&M I was able to get dinner with Ruffin and family and I am so grateful for those moments because I felt as loved that I got to spend time with family.
Grant Chamberlain One of the many Saturdays that Ruffin and I spent together during our time at UVA. Whether it was debating the merits of the UVA football team, watching other sports, or just hanging out, I will cherish the time I got to spend with him.
Reid Wilcox Ruffin, Reid, Ben, and Henry looking sharp.
I had the privilege of staying in Ruffin's room during one Network weekend at the King's house. Ruffin had graciously stayed with friends to avoid the gaggle of women. I was struck how "guy" oriented it was. Even though it was a large room, it was chocked full of sports equipment and memorabilia. Clearly a passion for exercise and activity. On...
Remembering Ruffin as a toddler, when we came to visit y'all in C'ville, and then again at our last time together, in C'ville at dinner in November 2019. What a delight to see that adorable tow headed, chubby-cheeked toddler had grown into a handsome, sweet, sensitive, and engaging young man. We will never forget him.
Austin Cress One of my favorite memories with Ruffin was rushing the field after beating Virginia Tech in football. This is a memory that I will cherish forever.
I'm lucky enough to have stayed out on Far Hills more times than I can count, but this one visit in particular continues to stand out in my memory. The Kings were always so kind and gracious to take me in like one of their own on my long road trips between my college in upstate New York and home in North Carolina regardless of whether Alexandra was...
Kylie Hegemier My brother and Ruffin this past summer hanging by the pond at our house. 🤍🤍🤍
Ruffin you will always be remembered in the brightest light. You had the kindest heart and I loved seeing you shine whenever we were together. I feel so lucky to have had the chance to spend one summer in CVILLE with you and your family while I was at UVA. I will always remember your bright blue eyes and white tow head, so handsome and gentle with ...
McKinley Larkin Ruffin and I posing for a silly photoshoot after the Conor McGregor fight. Even though he never mentioned it unprovoked, Ruffin knew so much more about the UFC than anyone else I’ve ever met. Anytime we had a discussion about the UFC, I just submitted to him and took his opinion as fact.
From Catherine Laws: Sending loving thoughts and prayers to you and your family. Today and always, may loving memories bring you peace, comfort, and strength during this difficult time.
Adelaide Conway From George Flinn: Rest in peace my friend
From Jim Travisano: Lilia and I are so very sorry. Sending our love and prayers.
From Joseph Tyler: My thoughts and prayers are with you during what I know is a difficult time.
Adelaide Conway From Matthew Rose: Ruffin, You have impacted my life in such a positive way. So much of the happiness I found in tennis was embedded in getting to play alongside you. Every year we knew each other was special and I will cherish all the memories we made together. Thank you Ruffin, Matthew Rose 🌹
From John Colligan: Dear Ruffin, Adelaide and Alexandra, Lacey and I are sending you our heartfelt condolences and love. We are so sorry for your loss of your beloved Ruffin.
Adelaide Conway From Val King Saunders: April 2015- Spring break visit in Charlottesville. This series captures Ruffin the way I knew him. Quiet confidence, an athletic star, giving his time to Evan so selflessly. I see an ease in him here. Evan idolizes Ruffin in these pictures --all he would want to be. I remember this morning well. Evan was over the moon to be playing one-on-one (ha!) and getting his older boy cousin's undivided attention.
From Richard Garrard: So terribly sorry for your loss. Sending thoughts and love and wishing you and your family peace and comfort.
Adelaide Conway From Val King Saunders: Ruffin 2009
Adelaide Conway From Val King Saunders: 2015 Basketball time with Evan
From Jeannine Fields: Words seem so inadequate to express the sorrow I feel for your loss. My heart goes out to your family during this time of sadness.
Adelaide Conway From Daniel Thomas: Dear Ruffin, Thank you for all of the memories. Not only just the ones you gave me, but the ones you gave everyone. You will be remembered as a kind person that made everyone around you smile. I am so honored for the years I knew you and you will forever live on in our memories and thoughts. Thanks for everything, Ruff -Daniel ❤️
Adelaide Conway From Justin King: 2014 Outer Banks
From Laura & Peter Thomas: Ruffin, Adelaide and Alexandra, We are so very sorry for your tragic loss. We will always remember Ruffin, his gentle soul, and his wonderful smile. You are in our thoughts. Laura and Peter
We will always remember the joyous day the beautiful Ruffin and Alexandra were born. Both were always exceptional in every way! Ruffin, we all love you so much and you will always be a shining star in our hearts forever. May god bless you and your beautiful family! Forever our Love, Pen, Daphne,Pen, Hampton and Bridges
From Luci Craig Riddick Kent: I am beyond devastated for earth’s loss of dear, sweet Ruffin. I remember him as a child at Meriwether Lewis. He was always, smiling, energetic, and kind, even to children whom others didn’t like. He appeared mischievous and yet he really wasn’t. That twinkle in his eye gave him away every time. He could always be cou...
From Robyn Gavin: We have fond memories of Ruffin. We are so sorry for your loss. With love, Chris, Robyn, and Jacob Gavin
From Susan Pollart: I remember Ruffin on the tennis court! My son, Joe Squillace, played with and against Ruffin many times and I was always taken by Ruffin’s cool on the court. He had such a strong physical AND mental game! Joe and I grieve with you.
Adelaide Conway From Bonnie DeAtley: We cherish all our memories of Ruffin, especially his: * warm smile and kind nature; * camaraderie on the soccer field; and * full throated Boarfish cheers before many a swim meet. Prayers for healing and strength to Ruffin, Adelaide and Alexandra from the DeAtley family. Bonnie, Adam and Lucas
From Gretchen Masselli: We are so, so sorry for your loss. We fondly remember Ruffin playing tennis or working out at the gym at The Boars Head. Always a sweet smile and friendly hello. We will keep your family in our thoughts and sending prayers and love. John and Gretchen Masselli 💕
From Ellen and David Saunders: We are grieving with Ruffin’s family for their loss, and joining you today.
From Lisa Plog: I taught Ruffin in 10th grade history at St. Anne's-Belfield. He was a quiet, thoughtful, sometimes mischievous student, and I loved teaching him. He seemed to view the history I taught with quiet curiosity, often understanding and perhaps feeling more deeply than his classmates. One day, I delightedly told him that we shared a bir...
Adelaide Conway From Daniel Thomas: ‘Remember Ruffin King’ -Beta Bridge, Charlottesville
I never had the pleasure to meet this young man, but his Dad (Ruffin) often spoke of our children - know that you are loved and you will be missed - we shall not seek to understand, but mourn with those that loved you best. May eventual peace find its way to our hearts and minds -
From John Hermsmeier: I write as a stranger to thank you for sharing Ruffin's story, and to celebrate with you this wonderful person who lived such a rich life. He reminds me of my children, of similar age and experiences, and of the special students I have had the privilege to know over the years.
Adelaide Conway From Val King Saunders: 2009 Summer visit in Charlottesville. Ruffin, Winnie, Evan, Phoebe, Alexandra
From Cindy Cass: Ruffin, Adelaide and Alexandra, the three of you were beyond courageous today. I was so moved and touched—a lovely service for your dear sweet boy. Your Ruffin inside the very being of God, and may you feel God’s presence surrounding you every minute in all the days ahead. Love and the peace that only God can give to each of you.
From Jocelyn Schauer: I am so very sorry for your loss, Adelaide, Ruffin, and Alexandra. I remember Ruffin and Alexandra when they were little (so very sweet). Sending prayers for peace and comfort to you all at this sad and difficult time. You are all in our hearts.
From Michael Borton: The Borton family grieves along side of the King family. Please know you all are in our thoughts and prayers. We pray for God’s special blessings during this time.
From Anne and Wilson Brown: Our deepest sympathies and much love, Anne and Wilson
From Mary Crawford: Ruffin and Adelaide, I am so sorry to hear about your loss. We are sending you love from Richmond and have you all in our hearts. Mary and Rich Crawford
From Zip and Alyson Maupin: Our thoughts and prayers are with the King family.
From Daniel Becker: Linn and I, as doctors, read the obits every day. We were surprised and saddened to see a familiar name. We only know one Ruffin. It is a long way from birding a few years ago to this tragic event. Offering condolence doesn't help much, nor does mentioning that tragedies like this are familiar to us personally and professional...
Adelaide Conway From Val King Saunders: 2010 A strategy session
Adelaide Conway From Val King Saunders: 2017 Thanksgiving at Aunt Catherine's NYC
Adelaide Conway OBITUARY Robert Ruffin King V JANUARY 18, 1998 – FEBRUARY 2, 2021 From a young age, Ruffin was easy to pick out from a crowd with his tall frame and exceptionally white shock of blonde hair. As he grew older and added inches to his height, he began to stand out for other reasons, too, based largely on a deeply kind and sweet essence that was grounded at his very core. Anyone who interacted with Ruffin could feel the way in which he cared about other people simply for who they were, no matter their standing or status. He was always respectful to waiters, engaging with children, and attentive to animals. He had high integrity and was very funny in his own unique and quiet way. He was and always will be a kind soul. Ruffin graduated from the University of Virginia this Winter, his dream school since he was a child trick-or-treating on the Lawn, with a B.A. degree in Foreign Affairs with a minor in Entrepreneurship. He attended St. Anne’s-Belfield for high school, graduating in 2016. Ruffin was a lifelong sports fan of UVA and the Miami Dolphins. In addition to hanging out with his friends and watching sports, he enjoyed games of pickup basketball. He was an accomplished junior tennis player, competing in many USTA regional events over the years. Ruffin will be deeply missed by his family and friends. The former group includes his parents Adelaide and Ruffin King; twin sister Alexandra King; aunts and uncles Catherine, Pendleton, Daphne, Wade, Heather, John and Suzanne King; Peter and Sandra Conway; Brett and Melissa Bond; and Reid and Suzanne Wilcox; first cousins Valerie, Andrew, Phoebe and Evan Saunders; Justin, Anna, Bahan, Pendleton, Hampton, Bridges, Carly, Jaqueline, Robert and Riley King; Peter, Ben, and Adelaide Conway; Brett, Lucinda and Reid Bond, and Ben, Henry and Ellie Wilcox. Two adults who were particularly important in Ruffin’s life were his godmother Elizabeth McMillan Hagood, and his Wednesday lunch buddy Elaine Brown. And, of course, his loving and trusted canine companion: Winnie. In lieu of flowers, please consider honoring Ruffin’s memory through a donation to the Charlottesville SPCA or to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, With Love for Ruffin King Campaign, through the following link: https://afsp.donordrive.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=donorDrive.personalCampaign&participantID=2387689
Family and friends
Memorial Service: 2/6/2021 at 1:00PM EST Link to Live Stream: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCcphLkdCAt_yWcd8yBr4aLg “Grief never ends… But it changes. It’s a passage, not a place to stay. Grief is not a sign of weakness, nor a lack of faith… It is the price of love.” — Unknown
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