Mack (Charles Mack) Lester's memory board

This is what I wrote:- A quote I saw tonight (that being tues. 10th Oct.) “The best gift you can give to someone is your time, because you are giving them something you can never get back.” DEMENTIA is an awful insidious disease. I feel I have been grieving the loss of my Dad for years as the dementia got worse so my grieving increased. (And Dad didn’t have it as bad as some – he only forgot my name once or twice) He had it for 24 years. Many people have said how wonderful I am, what a good daughter I am, and I appreciate the words, however how could I walk away? Many people are shocked to hear Mack had it this long. Many people think my Mum Laura is bossy etc. but she has a love that is unsurpassed. She is and was a staunch protector and supporter of Mack (as she has been for all her family over the years) and didn’t want him humiliated or embarrassed. But you just needed some quality time and to know what was going on his life to realise ‘ok yep there is something not quite right here’. That is why we have asked that in lieu of flowers today (if you feel so inclined) you might want to donate to Alzheimer’s Australia (envelopes/information are at the door on the way out). This disease has done a lot of damage in our family and I would love a cure to be discovered to stop the carnage in other families. That is why I did what I did played endless games of UNO, played scrabble, talked with him (not at him), took him to shows that may not have been my taste but he really really wanted to go (and he loved company- not very happy to go alone) The Tivoli show at The Bankstown Sports, he really loved those shows (and of course the massive scones, cup of cream, and jam pulled some weight in the enjoyment of the morning shows), he would alternate between those and The Revesby Workers Shows. As I said he didn’t like to go alone and Mum didn’t enjoy the clubs so he took many people from Albert Street over the years, he also had a lovely group at the club he met with regularly. Even the booking girl would give him special seats or deals. Yes everyone I have spoken with or dealt with regarding Mack have had only lovely words to say. I took him to so many shows when Mum was physically unable to accompany him anymore I took him to Elvis shows (he had one tribute singer he followed around to different clubs, we even went with his fan club on a harbour cruise), The Man from Snowy River show (one of his favourites) I cannot name theatre shows or we would be here all day. He was always looking for something interesting to do and someone to go with, he loves surfing movies and took me to the Footbridge Theatre to see a surfing movie I thought yeah boring but no it was great I was perhaps 16 years old that movie was to travel all over the world. I had the same experience with adventure movies we went to see Across the Top this was in the 1960’s wow to this day we enjoyed watching these types of shows together even in the nursing home if I went down in the evening I would put his tv on and we would watch David Attenborough together and this would bring up a whole dialog about his camping days with his Dad or experiences with different cars, animals you name it my Dad could nearly give you a story every time. My Dad was a wonderful Dad to me, my family and my friends. He was (I believe) one of the best neighbours you could ever want for (we even have here today neighbours of mine who really wanted to pay their respects to Dad/Mack). If he saw a want he would find/invent/discover/produce a solution. When we were children I saw this great ride in a park down the south coast, I asked him if we could have one to my disbelief he built this great swing that all the neighbourhood kids could get on as well, it was a ship on the ocean, a space ship, a cob an co wagon, And when we grew out of it it went to the family of 6 children next door and they had it for many more years. At around 75 Dad again blew my mind and built me a car port. He saw a dismantled one on the foot path in Revesby asked the guy if he could have it, he quickly picked it up, delivered to my place all while I was at work it was built in no time, and to Mum’s horror. She rang me ‘have you seen your father’ answer ‘he’s on top of the carport putting the roof on’ Mum ‘you tell him to get down right now I don’t want him to fall’ me ‘yeah I tried that he said he wont be long’. When we cut down my macadamia tree he turned up with electric saw and a ladder …. I said what are you going to do with that …. He said cut down the tree … I said ‘oh no you don’t can you imagine what Mum would say if I tell her you have the saw in the middle of your forehead’ we came up with an alternative plan … His CHAIN SAW (in his opinion is the best gardening tool you can have) I would be on the phone with Mum and the next she’d yell ‘I hear the chain saw I gotta go’. He was so proud when he was asked if he could find a solution to “The Little Aussie Legends” HE WAS THE ONE to develop a way a motor bike engine could be utilized with a diff to drive these ¼ size cars in races. They were used all over Australia. He did this in his late 70’s and built 74 differentials. They came to him later (cause the guy that took over from Dad couldn’t get rid of some problem they had developed) when Dad was in his mid 80’s they wanted him to do them again but Dad had to decline. Just between you and me I know he was tickled pink to think that they thought enough of him they came back to him but also disappointed that he was tired and now that phase of his life was now passed. Mum just told me that a few years ago she got a phone call from a guy who wanted Dad to do a diff. Mack had done one 20 years before for him Mum said ‘he’s not doing them anymore he’s over 90’. Yep that is how good a diff. man my Dad was. An old neighbour of Mum and Dad’s said one time ‘I cannot believe Mack, my husband talks about doing things but Mack just does them’. Some people think that Mum drove Dad to do stuff, but no, Dad got bored and was always looking for adventures, things to do, and interesting things to do as well. And I am sure that you all have your stories, you all have had wonderful times with Dad. Dad always wanted to see people happy, having fun. How many of you have been to parties, barbeques, outings and Dad would say to us ‘ok so what are we going to do’ so we always had games either physical coits, shuttle cock, darts, table tennis, patong, ahahah and if desperate cricket this happened more when John came into the family and of course David is crazy about cricket too. We also played copious amounts of gin, UNO, dominos, and eventually backgammon and of course back to UNO as that was what Dad could only cope with. Food was another one of Dad’s favourite things and this certainly encouraged Mum to become the fantastic cooked that she is. He loved it all, so she cooked it all. I cannot tell you the number of times when I was there I would hear Mum say “Mack what are you doing out there’ ‘nothing’ came the reply, ‘I can hear the fridge door, don’t you eat anything dinner is nearly ready’ door shuts you can hear Mack walking in . Mum says ‘what’s in your mouth’ ‘nothing’ is mumbled around cake, chicken a bit of something. He sits in his chair, next he is fossicking around you hear the packet then ‘Helen do you want a lollie’ hehehe he loved his lollies. We were asked his favourite the other day everyone started talking at once naming them one after another, maybe not in the same order but he just loved them and CHOCOLATE. One Christmas I said to everyone we always give Dad chocolate (it seemed the easy gift) how about we make sure we give Dad other things. Well, every gift he opened you could see his face drop. At the end he said ‘NO CHOCOLATE?’ I explained why but got the silent message THERE WAS TO BE AT LEAST ONE present of chocolate at each celebration. It has been said to me a couple of times about regrets, regrets of time out of my life spending it with Mum and Dad, regrets of things not shared, regrets of things not said, regrets of times not spent. Well there are no regrets. I said everything to Dad that needed to be said. I did all that I could. The last drive I took him on (14th August after going to the podiatrist) was along Henry Lawson Drive to a lot of the parks that we both took my children to on picnics and bike rides  so many bike rides or even just walking and talking watching the children play in front of us of course there was always a picnic basket, thermos, and a bickie not too far away. BUT and this is big, huge he isn't suffering, he IS at peace, has now embarked on the next phase of his journey, I know he will rest up (over there) and be catching up with everyone he has missed for so long ... all his sisters have been waiting and one nephew, his Mum and his dearly missed Dad. I think his Dad passing upset him more than any other and that was 52 years go. He is the last of his generation on that side of the family to go. And only a couple of his peers are alive they being in their 80's .... a neighbour of 66 years in their old neighbourhood aged 95 passed 9 weeks ago so it’s all changing .. life goes on but I am at peace thinking that his mind will be clear, his fingers will have free movement, his body supple and strong ...... as I said on leaving "I love you Dad and always will" I’d like to publicly thank my Mum, Kathryn, David, Suzanna, my cousins Lorraine and Edna/Ella, my friends Christine, Doris, Jan, Kerry, Liz and John. All of these for emotional support and friendship and some for physical support. All very gratefully received. I thought last week was tough well it just seems to get tougher the further time goes on. I keep thinking Dad is down the hall from Mum. But I know he is with me, we have already connected (which is some comfort). Also thank you to the hands on staff at the nursing home they were very gentle and kind to Dad. Thank you everyone for coming today. LAURA would like to say: ‘We had 75 wonderful years together and I will miss him and I will always love him.’